Emotional Trauma vs.Physical Trauma
By Shannon Knight
Physical trauma can affect the strongest of us, but people can see the injuries, and they get tended to more quickly. However, emotional trauma and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) can also profoundly affect the human body. We get confused because we are in pain, and people cannot see the injury that it left, and it can be long-lasting.
It can devastate lives if it is left untreated. It takes time, sometimes years, to heal and to feel safe. It’s painful and can be exhausting to heal emotional wounds from past traumatic events in our life. Many of us automatically put it on the back shelf, sweep it under the rug, or choose a vice to help them forget it.
Getting a cancer diagnosis can cause the most intense fear. In fact, just waiting for results is a traumatic event from the moment you hear those dreaded words, ” You might have cancer.” Still, once we find out, we immediately want all the measurable results about the cancer diagnosis. We focus on the physical and visible symptoms, just like an injury. We want our blood work, our radiology reports, and a treatment plan for the body. We want cancer gone now!
We face tough decisions on healing from cancer physically, but we are ready to do what we must.
We do not get a measurable report of how cancer injured us emotionally. It is often left behind and not tended to. Our physician’s discussion is rarely about how to start healing emotionally from that additional trauma caused by receiving a cancer diagnosis. I am not talking about taking an anti-anxiety pill once a day; I am talking about healing from the emotional injury caused to us.
We are told, “It’s okay to cry”; if we are lucky, our doctor will hug us. Studies of the prevalence of PTSD have proven that individuals with PTSD have lower natural killer cell response levels. The level of circulating inflammatory markers increased, which can cause cancer progression.
We cannot ignore that this is a psychological priority in healing cancer.
If you already suffer from PTSD, it is important to be evaluated by a psychiatrist to provide psycho-physiologic support while coping with the added stress of making tough decisions about your cancer treatment. In other words, when we fill out our medical history, the doctor’s responsibility is to recognize if we have a history of depression, panic, PTSD, etc. and make it a first priority to line you up with a psychologist (Not a support group) A doctor to help with the mental stress you will have to cope with in facing treatment.
To understand what it feels like when getting a cancer diagnosis, imagine a car coming right at you within inches of your life. Imagine being on a plane where the pilot told you it’s going to crash and that only a percentage of passengers will survive. That kind of trauma has a physical impact on the body, and it is getting ignored when we are diagnosed with cancer.
Suppose you went through a traumatic incident or are trying to cope with daily trauma like domestic violence or a number of situations. Losing a loved one can hurt emotionally for years. If emotional healing never took place from traumas before a cancer diagnosis, it can be catastrophic to your health.
I know the thought of healing the heart, mind, and soul can feel overwhelming. I know because I went through it, and I am confident now that it is vital to get help with the unseen injuries in order to have complete healing of the body.
As a life coach for women and a stage 4 cancer survivor, I get contacted by women facing cancer, with the most common concern being their diet and cancer treatments. They wonder what they did wrong with their eating habits. Was it the drinking? The smoking? The sugar? Maybe it was too much bread, soft drinks, chips, etc. I am not invalidating the importance of a healthy diet, but it is a primary focus.
It is sadder when I hear that their family is adding more pain by blaming them for getting cancer. Quite simply, they use it as an “I told you so guilt trip.” Sadly, this is a familiar story shared with me by many women; I went through it too. Some family and friends are toxic, and it is hard to imagine how to stop that cycle of emotional abuse without facing a consequence later. It feels impossible to many women facing this. However, once they learn self-compassion, it is not as difficult as they thought.
Many women who know have asked me the same thing about how I have stayed cancer-free since 2011 (I was stage 4). To answer generally, after years of working on my own emotional healing, I found it crucial to be aware of what I focus on each day; sometimes, it feels like one minute to the next. What’s essential is self-awareness. I have that now, and so can you.
People can look at my Facebook page and see how I unashamedly focus on love and life because it heals my heart daily. If I struggle with PTSD symptoms, I know what I need to do because I planned ahead. I do prep work and put happy obstacles in my way. I do not post politics or frightening things on my Facebook. I put love, I put songs, faith, hope, and gratitude all over, and it works! I am very intentional with my prep for potential triggers each day. I have a song playlist called “Shannon’s Feel Good Songs,” I use it frequently.
I try not to watch anything too depressing or frightening, and I avoid political news. I fell into that during the 2020 election, COVID, and riot news. What a disaster for me mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. I felt like I got pulled into a giant whirlpool in a stormy sea daily. NO MORE!
Leave a trail of breadcrumbs (Feel-good, Song’s, Movies, People to talk to who cheer you up, etc.) that can lead you back to joy, faith, and hope if you should drift off onto a darker path. Have a plan.
I get asked the wrong questions; it’s unintentional, of course. What diet am I on? What supplements do I take? Those are great questions for a qualified dietician. I rarely get asked, “How can I heal from this emotional trauma I am going through?” That’s something I know a lot about. Cancer was a traumatic event for me, and it happened to me twice. Many women have benefited from the knowledge I provide in my life coaching techniques. They have gained new insight on how to get through the daily journey of healing emotionally. You will find that It gets easier each day with the tools I provide and daily practice. You are not alone.
I know the reason I got cancer was not because of what I was eating; if anything, it was more about what was eating at me; for decades. I made it my mission once I left my final toxic relationship in 2012 to heal my mind, spirit, and heart. My thoughts were controlling me and traumatizing me- they were out of control. Like a director of a movie, I wanted to be able to say “CUT!” when it was time to change the direction my thoughts were taking me.
If you want to learn more about what it means to have self-compassion and how you can be happy each day despite the traumatic circumstances you are faced with, contact me. Your emotional well-being is so essential on the cancer journey, and I specialize in coaching women going through cancer on how to be the director of their thoughts and how to love themselves fiercely.
Your emotional healing can start now.
